It's impossible for Americans intentionally design a game that will appeal to the Japanese. If you don't believe me, go and design and produce a game and then try and market it Japan.

See! What did I tell you? (And it's impossible for Canadians and Brits, too! So quit looking for loopholes, jackass.)

However, we here at Xanadeaux were born to do the impossible. Our method was simple: create a concept that appeals to no audience, give it absurd game mechanics, and then translate all game materials to Chinese and back with an automated translator.

We give you:

As far as we can tell, the gameplay revolves around you trying to control a rodeo dog in a barrel race. But here's the twist: a cowboy monkey is clinging to the dog's back, trying to thwart your attempts to control the dog. Oh, and there's also an evil mutant trying to destroy the world (we think).

We all know that bad English is hilarous, but try and see past it and grasp the diamond-like brilliance of this game!

You can't, can you?

And that is why this game will OWN JAPAN.